Being a BADASS!
We’ve heard it before….Confidence breeds Confidence! Am I right?
But what if you struggle with finding confidence in the first place?
How can you be badass when you don’t even know what being badass looks like for you?
I’ve always been told by others that I am a confident person, but just like many of you, I also have my own insecurities about certain things. When I feel these insecurities start to creep in, I take a minute to look at the multitude of post-it notes that surround me in my home. Positive affirmations and written words of kindness and encouragement, especially around my bathroom mirror and in my office.
For those days when my confidence is lacking or I’m feeling “less than”, just seeing these friendly and gentle notes I have left for myself, helps!
Here are a few tips I have put together to help you find your inner BADASS and some ways that you can give yourself a little “kick in the pants” when you need self-assurance and encouragement in building your confidence.
(1) BUST A MOVE….. WITH BEEEEYONCE!
If there was ever a musician that can make you shake your bootaaaay like a polaroid picture, it’s Queen B. Not only do her lyrics make you feel SO good (bootylicious even!) but moving your body and releasing “good vibe” energy can do wonders for your body, mind, and your soul/spirit! Listening to music and finding that connection to the rhythm, is in our DNA and makes us feel good. So, find yourself a judgment-free space, put on your favourite playlist, and strut your stuff. Let it all out, dance like no one is watching…and just LET GO…..like seriously! It may feel utterly ridiculous at first…but you’ll thank yourself afterward….I promise!
(2) I SEE PRIDE! I SEE POWER! I SEE A BADASS MOTHER WHO DON’T TAKE NO CRAP OFF OF NOBODY!
This is one of my all-time favourite quotes from a much loved, 90’s movie “Cool Runnings” about a Jamaican Olympic bobsled team. Every time I hear this quote or watch this scene, I’m reminded of how powerful our dialogue can be. Finding a mantra like this (or one that feels right for you), that you can say and use on tough days or in difficult moments, can be helpful and remind you that whatever you’re going through, in that moment, you have the power to work through it! Stop for a minute, breathe, and look at yourself in the mirror (or even close your eyes) and say the words! Use your affirmation to get you through the moment. Sometimes I like to pair this one with the song “THE POWER” by SNAP (yes…another 90’s reference…haha!) to give myself a double dose of badass confidence!
3) WEAR IT ON THE OUTSIDE!
Now this will be different for everyone, but we all have that one “killer” clothing item that just oozes confidence from the moment those threads hit our body until we take them off at the end of the day! Something that screams “Damn, I look good in this” or “That’s right….I’m a cool and sexy MF (and I’m not even wearing underwear!!). Wearing clothes we love and feel great in not only helps us “feel” good but it also helps show the world who we are! So go grab those skin-tight leather pants and biker jacket, that power pantsuit or flowing gown and sparkly tiara, and rock the hell outta that shit!
Miss T loved this outfit! She said it made her feel strong, confident and badass and now she has the photos to prove it!
(4) SURROUND YOURSELF WITH GOOD HUMANS!
The environment we sometimes find ourselves in can often have a direct impact on how we feel about ourselves. A toxic relationship, a stressful workplace or boss, a friend, family member or work colleague who has low vibe energy. These can all be stressful relationships that hinder us from showing up for ourselves because we are constantly trying to avoid and or navigate around these types of people. While we can’t always remove ourselves fully from some of these situations (we need to work to live and survive, we can’t choose our family etc) but you can give yourself the best possible opportunity to build and grow confidence by minimising your engagement with these types of folks wherever possible. Find people you can connect with that give you good energy. People who are excited to see you and happy when you are around them. People who are committed to investing time in you and your relationship. Finding your tribe is a place where confidence is nurtured and where it will grow. When you find your humans…you will know!
(5) DO SOMETHING THAT EXCITES YOU OR BRINGS YOU JOY!
This is one of my favs!! Do you have a “wish list” of things that you would like to do or try? Are there certain activities that you use to do in your past that you love but haven’t visited in a while? Encourage yourself to revisit these things or make yourself a new list of possibilities. When we put our energy into the things that bring us joy, it allows us to see the things we are capable of.
In my youth, I used to be a hip-hop dancer (can you believe it?) but I hadn’t hip-hopped on a dance floor in many MANY years. Until I recently signed up for hip-hop classes at my local dance studio. I had forgotten just how much I loved to move my body this way and how much happiness I felt just being around others who love dancing as much as I do! Even though I may be the oldest person in my class (and a whole lot slower and rusty than in my youth) the act of dancing again brought me so much joy and to be back doing something that I loved some much as a young adult, well it felt SO GOOD!
So…. my advice to you…..GO DO THE THING….and be proud of the fact that you are showing up for yourself!! Confidence is built one step at a time and maybe now is your time to step into your power!
A xoxo
“A bird on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking because its trust is not in the branch, but in its own wings”
